FIC: Can Barely Hide, chapter 46; nc-17 reno/cloud - Spurked!
|Feb. 14th, 2011 06:51 pm FIC: Can Barely Hide, chapter 46; nc-17 reno/cloud|
TITLE: Can Barely Hide, chapter 46Can Barely Hide
PAIRING: Reno X Cloud
AUTHORS: lilymoon1 as Reno, grygon as Cloud
Reno muttered and hissed his displeasure at being awakened. His exhausted body and mind wanted nothing more than to stay peacefully asleep. He blinked open bleary eyes and saw that the sun was beginning to set. It was time to get up, get cleaned up and face his employer. Reno was worried about the meeting. His instincts were telling him it was going to be something more than just a debriefing.
While some of the details were still fuzzy Reno *knew* that Tseng had seen what had become of Roy. Both he and Rufus would also know by now, too, some of the experiments that had been performed on himself and Cloud. It made him ill to think that Shinra might have ideas about performing their own tests.
Reno shivered and ran a trembling hand over Cloud's bare shoulder and chest. He wouldn't allow it. He *couldn't*. Reno resisted the impulse to grab his drowsy husband and make a run for it. Rude had promised that everything would be okay. The Turk softly pet Cloud's hair until he had calmed himself somewhat then tilted the blond's chin for a kiss.
"It's almost time, baby. I need to get in the shower." Another kiss and a nuzzle through the soft hair at Cloud's temple. "Do you feel ready to wash up now? I promise to mark you again with my scent as often as you want," Reno said with a small smile.
Giving Reno a sleepy smile, Cloud stifled a yawn and nuzzled his cheek
against his husband's shoulder. He didn't like the idea of washing up
only to go out *there* and meet with *them*, but he did feel like
being clean. The old sweat and dry cum on his body were starting to
become a distraction and uncomfortable.
Nodding, Cloud turned himself to face Reno and he didn't like the
exhausted look under those eyes. Why couldn't they have tonight to
just rest? But he knew he couldn't convince his husband to do
anything other than his duty, and as much as it terrified him he now
decided he couldn't let him face it alone. Not tonight.
Sitting up on his knees, he let the covers fall off his torso and he
rested a hand on Reno's side. "I'm going with you," he spoke softly,
almost fearfully. If Reno had reason to be unsure and to tremble,
then Cloud really didn't want to be any where near those people... but
he sure as hell wasn't going to stay home while his *life* walked into
He didn't want to discuss or talk about it any more. As long as Reno
stayed his side, he could do this... he turned his head to halt any
comments and pulled Reno out of bed with gentle, somewhat playful tugs
and nudges. He felt odd, almost afraid, but he forced himself to turn
his back in order to turn the facets on. He stayed facing the wall of
the shower, tense, as he told himself over and over the voice and
touch that were coming were his husband's...
The mere second seemed like a life time as time all but stopped for
him, and Cloud turned to face Reno before his nerves caused him to
jump his skin.
Reno bit back an unhappy sigh and silently reached for the bottle of shampoo. Time, he told himself. What they had been through, especially Cloud with his previous history, had been horrific. It would take time to heal the emotional damage even though their enhanced and augmented bodies had already recovered. If things went well at the meeting, hopefully, they would have that time. If things didn't go so well...
Reno turned his face into the spray to wet his hair then backed off so Cloud could. Since he had been tampered with he had become much better at sensing his husband's moods, and Cloud seemed wary and uncomfortable. Instead of immediately reaching out to massage the shampoo into Cloud's hair and risk an unwanted touch Reno smoothed it through his own and lathered it. A touch of vanity had him closely examining the ends of the long strands had frowning at the few splits and some breakage that could be seen.
"Conditioner," he muttered and rinsed out the shampoo before picking up the appropriate bottle.
The whole time he pampered his much prized and love hair Reno covertly kept a concerned and admiring gaze on his lovely husband. He was endlessly grateful that their ordeal had left only faint, and still fading, physical marks on Cloud. Not that he would love and desire the man any less. Oh no, Cloud could be as ugly as mutated cactuar and Reno would still want, love and need him. It just seemed a terrible crime to mar someone so perfectly put together. Others may have been awed and enamored of Sephiroth's looks but, to Reno, Cloud was the perfect example of outstanding male beauty.
Mindful of the time, Reno sighed and finished his hair to snag a cloth and the spicy scented shower gel. Remembering his promise to cover Cloud in his scent again, the Turk cautiously approached Cloud to press kisses to temple, cheek and lips.
"Let me do that," he murmured huskily, the pleasure he always found in caring for his husband evident in his tone.
Cloud didn't say a word but lightly touched Reno's arm and smoothed
his fingers down to his wrist to guide it up his chest. He watched
Reno's face as his husband lathered and washed his torso, stepping
close, skin-to-skin, and wrapped his arms around his neck so he could
wash his back.
As he gradually relaxed he sighed and rubbed his jaw against Reno's
neck. He felt a stab of guilt that even the idea of having his back
turned on his own husband scared him. This was his husband, a person
he trusted more than himself. Hesitantly, he pulled back and began to
turn. He took Reno's free hand to hold as he placed his back to him,
looking over his shoulder.
With a tremble he looked forward and took a shallow breath. "I don't
like being afraid like this," he mumbled. "Please..." He gently
squeezed Reno's hand. His breath hitched at the initial touch of the
cloth, but he planted his feet firmly this time, determined to at
least face the phantoms in his mind.
"It's okay," Reno soothed. "I swear on my life I would never hurt you or abuse you like that. Just listen to my voice and remember that it's only me touching you and that I've always got your back."
He kept the one hand entwined with Cloud's and used the other to scrub easy circles over his husband's shoulders and back. Reno murmured over and over quietly how beautiful Cloud was, how much he was loved and wanted. His touch stayed caring and intimate without any attempt at seduction as he washed down the length of his husband's spine, his hips and the lovely curve of his buttocks. When he was finished Reno enfolded Cloud in his arms and just held him until they were both rinsed clean.
After that Reno shut off the water and reached outside the shower door for his own robe. He wrapped Cloud in the thick, absorbent material and squeezed his shoulders.
"They honeymoon may have been a disaster, but I don't regret, not even for a moment, having married you. When I go in there I'm making sure they realize that Turk Reno is Reno Strife now. You come first now. Anything else comes second. Okay?"
Cloud smiled and nodded coyly. "You mean the world to me, I don't
know what I'd do without you here." With a slight dip of his head he
lightly sniffed the soft material near his neck to hide the color of
his cheeks. It smelled like Reno. Lifting the edges up he shrouded
his lips and nose in the material as he looked at Reno with hooded
"Don't let them deperate us tonight," he almost whispered. He was
afraid of what he could do, if he spooked... there was no telling what
direction his instincts would take.
Lowering the robe from his face he used the sleeves to dry his
husband's torso and abdomen before he rubbed and patted himself down
with the Reno scented robe. There was just one thing missing before
he dressed... placing his arms in a loose hug around Reno's neck, he
tilted his head to the side for his husband to freshen his marking.
As always, the submissive and trusting gesture called to Reno. He turned his head to kiss along one of the arms draped over his shoulders, adoring the heady sensation of clean, soft skin under his lips, the pleasing scent of water, soap and Cloud filling his nose. Reno slid his hands inside the parted robe to caress his husband's back as he pulled him closer and skimmed his lips over faint bruises.
The Turk couldn't fully explain why he felt compelled to do this. Even before he had been tampered with he had loved to see his marks of passion on Cloud's fair skin. Perhaps it was because it happened only because Cloud allowed it, only allowed *Reno* to leave a visible claim. With that in mind, he nipped and sucked gently until a dark red mark appeared then he drew back to admire the contrast in colors, the imprint of his teeth.
Reno would have loved to continue. Cloud, soft and compliant in his arms, was a temptation he normally wouldn't even try to resist but, again, he was reminded of the time. Reno placed a last kiss over the bruise then another one against soft lips before guiding his husband back into their bedroom. He dressed in a fresh uniform but didn't fuss with his hair, leaving it to fall around his face and eyes except for the long tail that was tied back.
While he waited for Cloud to dress Reno also armed himself with his usual weapons, only this time he wasn't sure if he was doing it out of habit or because of the possibility he might actually need them this time.
It felt good to be back in his own clothes. The black sleeveless
shirt and black baggy pants with his black boots were comfortable and
secure on his body. He loosened the zipper mid-chest so that the
collar fell open enough for Reno's mark to standout.
It was natural for him to want to arm himself when entering Shin-Ra
property, but seeing his husband arm himself worried Cloud. He was a
Turk, one of them, but he had been tampered with enough that perhaps
his boss was more interested in a lab rat than an employee now. That
terrified Cloud enough that he dug his harness and swords out.
Slipping into his harness and leg chap he remembered the wolf from his
shoulder guard was missing it's ring. Reno's ring. And a haunted
look passed over his face as he slipped the fusion swords into his
harness. The weight of cold metal on his back was familiar and was
right. Straightening his shoulders, he looked at his husband and
pressed in close for the comforting touch and scents. "You should
drive," he said softly.
All they needed was to end up roadkill under the weight of Fenrir
because Cloud spooked at the feeling of a living man against his back
and, for once, lost control of the monster bike. They'd survive, but
it wasn't worth the mental and physical pain.
Reno looped an arm around his husband and hugged him close. It was interesting how tactile they had both become, how much they both seemed to need the reassurance and comfort of the other's touch. Reno was sure the enhanced senses had something to do with it as well as the animal like qualities. Now his augmented and altered sense of smell told him that Cloud was nervous and uneasy just from the change in his natural scent. There was a sharp, metallic edge to it that rasped against his nerves and spurred him to comfort his mate.
Reno could also feel the cold metal of Cloud's swords pressing against his arm. They were both armed, dangerous and unwilling to be put through any more hell. Reno hoped desperately that the weapons wouldn't be necessary.
"I'll drive," he agreed although the reason he suspected was behind Cloud's request pained him. It hurt to know that Cloud still felt nervous having even his own husband behind him.
Reno glanced at his watch and used the few minutes they had left to stroke his fingers over the mark on Cloud's neck while nosing through the soft hair at his temple and purring softly.
The ride to headquarters was uneventful except for the warm and familiar feel of Cloud holding on. Reno linked their hands together as they walked into the building, and they entered unchallenged. He was also relieved somewhat to note that his security clearance and key cards still worked.
Reno knocked on Rufus' office door and opened it cautiously when granted permission to enter. He squeezed Cloud's hand before stepping over the threshold. Rufus sat at his desk, and Reno was surprised by the weary and concerned look on his boss' face. Tseng and Rude flanked the President. Reno tried not to read anything into the fact that both men only slightly inclined their heads in acknowledgment of his and his husband's presence. Rude was his partner, his best friend. He really did care about Reno and now Cloud. Reno swallowed against the nervous dryness in his throat. Rude still had his back, right?
"Have a seat, gentlemen," Rufus said in a carefully soft voice and motioned to the two chairs before his desk. "I realize you are exhausted and...overwhelmed...at the moment, but we have much to discuss and a limited amount of time."
Reno concealed a flinch when his acute hearing caught the sound of the office door being locked and held tightly to Cloud's hand as they sat. His left hand remained free if needed.
Cloud had never heard that tone of voice from Rufus. It unsettled
him- he was not an animal to be put at ease before a noose swung
around his neck. He sat at the edge of the chair, his harness
preventing him from sitting back. Not that he'd ever feel relaxed in
front of a firing squad.
He couldn't quite read Rude's demeanor, but something seemed wrong
with the man. Too indifferent when his partner sat on the opposite
side of their boss' desk, perhaps. Cloud stared at the man a moment
before he looked back at Rufus.
"What now," Cloud spoked dangerously. Overwhelmed? Fuck, he had gone
from overwhelmed to on the edge of going berserk at the sound of being
*locked* in. "Haven't we been through enough for you?" Cloud bit his
tongue at the near hysteric tone his voice was reaching. He looked
down to avert his eyes and his sword hand gripped the chair arm until
it squeeked under the pressure.
Taking a breath, his hand relaxed but he kept his eyes downcast.
Proving that he was an extremely perceptive man, Rufus tried to catch Cloud's eyes again.
"The door is locked to prevent anyone from entering. It's not to keep you from leaving, Strife. I'm not holding you prisoner."
Reno edged closer to Cloud until they were touching from shoulder to hip.
"Then why are we here, sir?" Reno bit out the question.
"Partly for a debriefing," Rufus answered. He folded his hands on the desktop. "Also to tell you that the doctor is currently under heavy security in the medical wing, but he's...in no condition to answer any questions or reveal any more accomplices."
Reno trembled and his eyes started to glow a venomous green at the mention of the doctor. Rufus took note of that as well as the low growling he could barely hear. His usually calm and easygoing Turk was nearly vibrating with fury.
"What changes have you noticed in yourself?"
"Huh?" Reno was startled by the question even though he was expecting it. "I'm...stronger, faster than before. All my senses have been enhanced." He left out any mention that he purred, hissed and snarled like a cat. "Other than that I really haven't had time to think about it too much."
"And that's the other reason why you're here. I understand you've been through hell, but I'm asking you to undergo testing to find out exactly what's been done..." Rufus' gaze flicked to Cloud. "to both of you." Rufus pressed on before either man could react. "The doctor can't, at present, tell us what he was planning. Reno, it could mean the health and safety of you and your husband, but it could also mean the safety of the world. Do you understand? If you agree Rude will oversee everything."
Reno shuddered with revulsion and pressed against Cloud as he fought the urge to jump up and tear through the door. But at least he had an answer for his partner's reserved behavior. Rude knew how both men would feel about such a request and was concealing his own distress.
"We're not lab specimens!" Reno hissed.
"No, you're not," Rufus agreed calmly. "But you've been injured, tortured, tampered with. Exactly what was done to you? To what extent? For what purpose? All that needs to be known. Your health and safety may depend on it. Cloud's, too. I'm not threatening you and I'm not ordering you, but both of you *are* in a very dangerous situation. Who's to say you haven't been programmed in some way? It would be better to know now than for you to suddenly slaughter your husband in his sleep then go on a rampage. The world is not ready for another Sephiroth."
By then Reno was shaking with so much fear and anger that both Rude and Tseng were tense and on guard. He was clinging to Cloud like a lifeline. The thought that he might hurt Cloud in some way at a later date filled him were terror, too.
"Just me," Reno finally said. "Cloud's been through enough. Don't...don't ask this of him, please."
Rufus shook his head. "I think you should trust your husband enough to make his own decision. Cloud?"
Cloud twitched at his name and raised his eyes to look at Rufus. They
had gone round in fear as memories of *testing* brushed his mind.
Rufus had a good point, though Cloud was more apt to glare at the man
than believe he had any actual good intentions here. Safety of the
world? Or opportunity to further his own power?
Beside him, Reno's nerves were practically vibrating hard enough to
set his teeth on edge. Cloud reached over with his free hand and
rubbed Reno's arm. He wondered if Rufus knew just how close he was to
being mauled. Cloud could almost taste it, the feel of that bastard's
face breaking under his fist.
Cloud turned in the seat to face Reno, searching his eyes and trying
to stop his own from bugging out. Seeing the green fear in those eyes
tugged at Cloud's sense of protection. He rubbed his husband's ear
and cooed softly. "I want to talk to Rude first. Just the three of
us," he tried to calm himself by touching his husband and avoided
looking at Rufus again.
Rufus didn't care for the feeling that he was being ordered from his own office, but he could see that the men, especially Reno, were near a breaking point. When Rude looked at him questioningly he nodded his agreement and unlocked the door. Tseng followed him into the outer office, locking the door again behind them. As soon as the door shut Rude's cool demeanor melted into that of a concerned friend. He rounded the desk and knelt before his shaking partner. He didn't try to touch but removed his shades and put them in his pocket.
"Reno? You have to calm down. It's reactions like this that have the boss doubting that you're okay." Rude looked at Cloud. "And before you ask, I didn't know. I was ordered to report an hour before you and told then. Even so...I still think we need to know as much as we can about what was done to you. You have to admit you've never been this volatile and emotional."
Reno moaned low in his throat and huddled in Cloud's embrace like he was trying to burrow under his skin. It was all so confusing. One minute he was the one being strong and comforting and protecting his mate, the next he was consumed by a killing rage, the next he was shivering and crying like a frightened child.
When Reno refused to answer him Rude appealed to Cloud. "I'll make sure you're both safe. No one is going to hurt you or experiment with you."
"What we've been through how can that man expect Reno to be okay?
Ofcourse he's not okay," Cloud bit each word out at a clip he wasn't
used to. He stared at Rude incredulously. Tearing his eyes away he
pressed his nose into Reno's temple, his eyes lowered in thought.
He ran a hand through Reno's hair in an attempt to sooth him, and
himself. "It'll just be you? Do you know what these supposed tests
entail?" He turned to face his husband's partner again, but rested
his cheek against Reno's temple. His voice softened. "I've been
there, more times than I remember, and I'll know... I'll just know."
Rude tentatively reached out and stroked Reno's hair as well. His partner was calming somewhat.
"Cloud, I'm just a medic. There would be two doctors involved, but I would always be there to oversee everything. The tests would involve blood and body fluid tests, x-rays, MRIs, CT scans, endurance and tolerance tests, possibly some psychological testing, too. One of the doctors is a geneticist. He would be the one trying to unravel what has been changed in your cellular makeup."
Rude dropped his hand to Reno's shoulder where his fingers could also lightly touch Cloud's.
"There would be no restraints. You can take a break and rest anytime you need to. I'll be there every minute. No one will treat you like a lab rat."
Reno finally stopped trembling and sagged against Cloud, weary and drained. "Does the boss know everything that went down?" he mumbled, closing his eyes and thinking of the rapes and his failure to protect Cloud.
"Yes," Rude admitted quietly, "he and Tseng both, but no one else is privy to that."
Cloud tightened his hold around Reno's shoulders. He took an unsteady
breath and pressed a kiss to his husband's forehead. "Let's get it
over with," he whispered quietly. "We'll be okay together."
His eyes glanced over Rude's hand touching his own before he looked at
Rude. "Don't leave us alone with them." He felt somewhat relaxed
with the other two men out of the room, and with Rude acting more like
himself. But the swords strapped to his back had never felt more
honed with a loved one to protect.
Rude curled his much larger hand around Cloud's. "You'll never be alone. A two bedroom suite has been set up in the medical wing. It's just if you need some rest, but you're always free to go home." Rude was doing his best to make Cloud understand it would *not* be like anything they had experienced before. Even though he believed the tests to be necessary he was firmly on their side.
"We just got home," Reno whispered. He was calmer, but in another lightning fast mood swing was leaning into Cloud and arching restlessly against Cloud's and Rude's hands in a silent bid for more of the comforting petting.
Rude sighed and released Cloud's hand to run his fingers through Reno's vivid fall of hair again. "I know, partner. Believe me, I know."
Cloud was powerful, and now Reno was, too. Reno had always been formidable in a fight, but now he had as much strength, if not more, as his husband. But for all their power Rude could see that both men were emotionally shattered and in need of protection. He was going to give them that. He cared very much for his partner and his still evolving feelings for Cloud wouldn't allow him to do anything less.
After a few minutes Rude noticed that Reno had closed his eyes and was softly purring as he kneaded his husband's shirt. Rude kept stroking his hair and raised his free hand slowly to run it lightly over Cloud's blond spikes.
"You will never be left alone," Rude repeated. He pet both men for several more minutes. "If it's all right with you I'll draw some of the blood from both of you tonight. It will give us something to work with that won't require you to be there after the initial draw. I also think you should spend the rest of the night in the suite. You both look too worn out to drive safely, and I'll be there to make sure no one disturbs you."
Cloud frowned, but nodded without protest. They had just got home,
and the first thing Cloud had wanted to do was spend a night in his
own bed. Instead, they had a nap and now were back to a strange bed
and more doctors.
The kneading on his shirt felt somewhat... right. Reno's changes from
the start always had felt right, though Cloud wasn't sure exactly why.
He watched his husband's hand with a calmer expression than he'd come
in with, but there was still a guarded anger under the surface.
After rubbing behind his husband's opposite ear, Cloud sighed and let
his hand drop once more to his shoulder where he squeezed gently.
"Let's get some rest," he murmered against Reno's temple. Standing
up, he took his husband's hand and pulled him close into his arms.
"We can spend tomorrow night in our own bed if you want."
Cupping Reno's cheek he looked into his eyes and gently ran a thumb
over one dark bag. "Maybe we should go without seeing Rufus again."
His own blood simmered with distrust at the mere thought. "Rude, can
you just take us to the medical wing?"
Rude took out his phone and made a quick call to inform Rufus of their intentions then replaced his shades as he slipped the phone into a pocket.
"We'll go out the back. It's the President's private entrance and there should be no one around this area at this time of night."
Reno stay snuggled tight against Cloud, unwilling to move away from his reassuring hold and exhausted enough to need the support as he stumbled along the hallways. Rude led them to a secure part of the medical wing. The small suite had two bedrooms, each with its own bathroom, on opposite sides of a lounge area. Rude turned in the doorway of the larger bedroom. The room was painted in soft, soothing colors and the lighting was muted. There was a decent size bed and two pairs of soft scrub pants lay on the comforter.
Rude ran his hand over Reno's hair again and couldn't help comparing his partner to a sleepy but tense and wary cat. "It will take me just a minute to get what I need to draw the blood. I'll be right back. The door locks from the inside and I'll be using my key card to get back in. No one else can access the door."
Rude left to get his supplies and to also give the two men what he thought would be a much needed minute alone together. Reno sighed tiredly and stepped away from his husband's arms to take off his uniform and slip into a pair of the scrub pants. He couldn't meet Cloud's eyes, feeling responsible and guilty for their current situation. After all, Rufus was *his* employer. Reno untied his hair with trembling fingers and let it fall forward to veil his face.
"I'm so sorry about this, baby."
"No..." Cloud dropped his harness, the swords clammoring as he rushed
to his husband. "None of this is your fault." He stood in front of
Reno and took his arms to pull him close.
"Please," he gently curved a finger under Reno's chin to lift his
eyes. "I trust Rude. We'll be okay here." He pressed his lips to
Reno's in a soft butterfly kiss but he didn't press for any more or
attempt to make it any deeper.
He guided Reno to sit on the bed and snuggled up close to his side.
Cradling his husband's head and shoulders he rubbed his neck
soothingly. "You know I'm smart, and I don't take abuse. If this was
a problem then I wouldn't be here now. But I trust you, damnit, more
than myself. So believe me when I say this isn't your fault."
"I know, baby. I know. It's just that I seem to keep making promises to keep you safe and they always get broken," Reno mumbled miserably.
The wildly fluctuating mood swings, the often desperate need to lean on his husband's strength since their horrifying ordeal, the failure to keep his promises to protect...all of it combined to make Reno feel even less worthy of Cloud. But at the same time the thought of losing him or letting him go left the Turk shattered with pain.
Reno bit his tongue against the faint whimper that wanted to escape and tried to pull himself together. His trembling quieted as Cloud's body heat warmed his bare chest. Reno nuzzled against his husband's neck and licked at his mark.
"After Rude's finished I just want to get under the covers with you and hold on for the rest of the night."
"You don't ever have to let go," Cloud whispered into his husband's
hair. "As long as I'm still alive, I don't think your promises are
breaking. Reno, all the pain in the world... there's one thing that's
kept me going since we came together. You keep saving me."
From that first day on the ruins, Cloud wondered if Reno knew just how
much he had saved his life. He grew quiet, thinking about that day as
he rubbed warmth into Reno's flesh.
He was so far lost in memory and the feeling of his husband, secure in
his arms, that he didn't register Rude entering until the man cleared
his throat. Blinking, Cloud moved his hand, but he was reluctant to
pull away. He gave Rude enough room to tie a tourniquet and to draw
blood, but Cloud continued to hold his husband.
Reno leaned with his head against Cloud's shoulder and only winced slightly when the needle entered his vein. Rude was so skilled that he barely felt it. The gentle handling was far different from what had occurred before so Reno relaxed further. The blood itself was a darker red than most people's and had almost a faint glow to it. Sixteen vials were drawn from Reno for a battery of tests before Rude decided he had enough.
"Gonna leave me any, partner? I'll probably pass out just trying to get to the bathroom."
"You've lost more in a bar fight," Rude chided even as he smiled quietly at Reno's sulky tone and tugged on a lock of loose, fiery hair. "And *still* kept kicking ass, if I recall correctly."
Just to be safe, though, Rude got a bottle of juice from the mini fridge and handed it, along with a pre-made sandwich, to the redhead.
"Eat. Even without the blood loss your energy levels are very low."
Rude waited until Reno had dutifully taken a few sips and was once again leaning drowsily against his husband before turning to Cloud. Just like with Reno, he had all his supplies laid out on a tray table so there would be no surprises. Rude held his hand out, palm up, to Cloud.
Reno snuggled closer and murmured, "I'm here, baby."
"Ready for your turn?"1 comment - Leave a comment
So things aren't quite as bad as they could be. but still they get cheated out of being home in their own bed...that's the hardest of all, really...just wanting to be at home where it feels like one can truly rest!